08-24-2009, 01:31 PM
[img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif[/img]
1. We cannot lose today
2. We cannot lose ground today to the Cards
3. No one can get injured (well, highly unlikely)
4. No black cats can run across the field.
5. No game to schedule your activities around (we may have a lot of those a little sooner than expected)
6. No Pooholes highlights on MLB/ESPN
7. The White Sox stand a good chance of getting smashed in Boston.
8. Bradley and Zambrano can't be ejected/suspended or trash the gatorade cooler.
9. Certain goats won't be denied access to the seating area at Wrigley.
10. We won't see Alf butcher any plays in Left, swing at balls in the dirt, or watch him slowly walk back to the dugout.
11. Kevin (no lead is safe) Gregg can't give away the ballgame.
[img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ph34r.gif[/img]
NOTE: Most of the above is blatant SARCASM.
1. We cannot lose today
2. We cannot lose ground today to the Cards
3. No one can get injured (well, highly unlikely)
4. No black cats can run across the field.
5. No game to schedule your activities around (we may have a lot of those a little sooner than expected)
6. No Pooholes highlights on MLB/ESPN
7. The White Sox stand a good chance of getting smashed in Boston.
8. Bradley and Zambrano can't be ejected/suspended or trash the gatorade cooler.
9. Certain goats won't be denied access to the seating area at Wrigley.
10. We won't see Alf butcher any plays in Left, swing at balls in the dirt, or watch him slowly walk back to the dugout.
11. Kevin (no lead is safe) Gregg can't give away the ballgame.
[img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ph34r.gif[/img]
NOTE: Most of the above is blatant SARCASM.
Fat Bastard is an immensely obese, hardly able to walk (weighing a metric ton) gardener and henchman hailing from Scotland. His extreme size endows Fat Bastard with super-human strength as exhibited by his prowess in the Sumo ring from Goldmember. This makes him a formidable enemy for Austin Powers. Fat Bastard is noted for his foul temper, his frequent flatulence, his vulgar and revolting bad manners and his unusual eating habits, which include taste for Human infants (which he calls "the other other white meat") or anything that looks like a baby, e.g. small people. Fat Bastard has been a regular at Cub games since the early 80's when he tried several times (unsuccessfully) to eat the visiting San Diego Chicken.